The wedding is approaching

The cursor is blinking at me taunting me to just type and get everything all out. I have so much going on in my head that it can not all form into words. Maybe I will try a list.

1. My shower was wonderful. I woke up yesterday morning around 5:30 with so many feelings that all I could do was sit at the foot of the bed and cry. I was like a kid waking up on Christmas morning but at the same time I felt a panic attack coming on because since we got in so late Friday (around 2:00 am) I did not get everything that I needed to get done.

BLINK BLINK BLINK ok no list just type.

I heard my grandmother in her room getting ready to go to work. She has moved in with my Dad so that the house is not as empty. I started walking around the house not knowing what I was looking for. I don't know if I expected to find my mother in her bathroom getting ready for the day or sitting at the table drinking her coffee and reading the paper with the weather channel on in the back ground. That used to annoy me so much and for reason I do not know. I would love to have that back.

It hit me yesterday morning that it was going to be hard being in the house preparing for my shower with Mom not here. I then realized that it is only going to get harder the closer the wedding gets here. I picked up my phone to call her the other day. I had to ask her something wedding related. I realized as I started dialing and laughed to myself.

Once my shower started I was still a big ball of nerves but i was starting to calm down a bit. When it came time to open gifts I reached for a bag and in it- towels and candles and decor for our home. The next box I see is a shiny gold box. I opened it and instantly began crying. In it was a cookbook I wrote in high school for a class, a stocking I made in 1st grade, and a stack of recipes. Every single one was in mom's handwriting. At this point I am shaking so hard and can not yet speak. I go further into the box to find 2 orange bowls that were out of my mothers kitchen. My Dad gave me the best gift of all - my Mom.

I asked one thing for my shower - I really wanted recipes. I love using cook books but I want recipes from people I know. Things that they like and would want to share. They could have got it out of their cookbook - I do not care. They liked it enough to share so it was theirs. As I continued opening gifts my hands were still shaking. I began finding recipe cards in the envelopes or paper clipped to the gift bags. Every other recipe was in my mother's hand writing. By the end of the shower over 50% of the recipes I received were my mother's. They were all recipes that I had never seen before.

So lately my little boy has had a lot to say and most of the time - when it is something I never want to forget I do not have a video camera anywhere near me.

Sam has been getting up extra early for the past few weeks. It leaves his momma stumbling around the house like a zombie screaming for coffee. He has decided that he wants to drink
coffee in the morning too. Every morning he brings me his cup and asks for coffee. I will get up and make me coffee and make him a cup of chocolate milk. We then sit on the couch and enjoy our coffee together while watching some cartoon on pbs.

He becoming pretty smart these days. He loves to color and so I have been trying to teach him the color names. I bought him a new package of markers and one of the colors was brown. When I asked him what color it was he said chocolate milk. I was VERY impressed that he could relate the two




This is the train he recently drew. I am so glad I was not a passenger on that train.

I asked him the other day what animals like pigs, cows, frog, dogs, and so on say. I then asked him what Mommy says and he pointed his finger at me and yelled "Don't throw Mac - Roni on the floor!" I laughed so hard because about a month ago I made him lunch and he grabbed a handful of macaroni and cheese he was refusing to eat and threw it in the floor. I told him not to throw it on the floor and made him go sit in time out on his bed.

Moving and Wedding Plans...

Wow it has been an incredibly long time since I have written a blog... I used to be really good about writing on myspace but have since moved away from myspace and have become more of a facebooker...

A lot has changed in the lives of Stephen, Sam and me in the last few months. We have finalized out moving plans to move to Las Colinas August 1 and we have kicked our wedding planning into high gear. We will be getting married Saturday October 19, 2009 at West Amarillo Christian Church in Amarillo Tx. I have been frantically trying to tie up loose ends before we move because we probably will not come back to Amarillo until September for my bridal shower and bridal pictures. I does panic me a bit that all of the last minute touches will either have to be able to be taken care of in Las Colinas or I will have to depend on some one else to do it. In the last 2 days I have managed to get the menu planned and cakes figured out. If only the rest of the planning would go this smooth I am sure I would have nothing to worry about.